~ by Father Ron Camarda

Where were you on September 11, 2001? What were you doing right before you heard about the tragedies of New York City and the fall of the Twin Towers? How did your day unfold?

I remember that I was getting ready to drive to St. Patrick’s Parish and School. My friend called me to turn the TV on. I had watched the Twin Towers crumble on the television. It almost seemed like a prank and that life as I knew it would be back to normal soon. I was in denial. Part of me knew that things would never be the same. Practically, I knew that I needed to fill the gas tank of my car. I remember going into the classrooms with Sister Carmel to prepare the children for something children shouldn’t have to experience.

Where were you on that day?

Little did I even imagine that the events of that day would change my life dramatically, never to be the same. Had the violent death of those people in New York, Pennsylvania and Washington never happened, I would have never been dragged into the desert of Iraq. I never would have been fearful and overjoyed with so many marines, sailors and soldiers fighting with the demons of war. The tear in the desert would never have been witnessed.

Where were you when the Shuttle Challenger exploded as it took off for space?

(I was at the seminary in Boynton Beach as I watched the “y” shaped smoke in horror.)

Where were you when you heard about the assassination of President John F Kennedy?

Where were you when you heard the news of Michael Jackson death?

Where were you when Martin Luther King died?

Where were you when you first heard of the earthquake in Haiti? Japan?

How were you affected when you heard of the death of Princess Di, Mother Teresa, or John Paul II?

Where were you when your mother, father, spouse or child died?

I am sure that most of these events trigger something within you that has a sense of being overjoyed and fearful…and terrifying. I shutter as I write about them here.

Beloved, it happened. Jesus was crucified and died.

It is so fresh and recent that I haven’t the words to express my grief and joy. It was April 8, 1979. The moon was full and I was on a merchant ship in Mombasa, Kenya. I had just finished reading the New Testament that I had started seven years earlier during the year of my Confirmation. At my request, my mother had taken me to the religious article store in order to buy the New Testament with the money I had saved from my paper route. I would read a chapter or two every day for seven years. I finished the last chapter of the book of Revelation on April 8, 1979 – Passion Sunday. After I had closed the bible, when I walked out of my cabin on the SS Christopher Lykes, I looked up at the full moon and then at the reflection of the moon on the water.

I was stunned. The stone that was blocking my understanding of Sacred Scripture was rolled back. I was terrified. I felt as if my body, soul and spirit were slam-dunked. No words can explain. I was dead like the soldiers at the tomb of Jesus. To understand what happened to me on that night, you would need to read the entire last two chapters of Revelation (The Apocalypse).

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth. The former heaven and the former earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. I also saw the holy city, a new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, God’s dwelling is with the human race. He will dwell with them and they will be his people and God himself will always be with them as their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, for the old order has passed away.” Revelation 21:1-4

The last words of the bible are from Revelation 22:18-21. The book is attributed to St. John who was below the cross standing beside the mother of Jesus as she watched her Son die on the cross for six hours. Beloved, we are now entering the seventh hour of perfection and Heaven. This is truly the best Easter ever. Were you there when they crucified my Lord? We don’t have to necessarily be at the foot of the cross, or even at the Good Friday service this year, but we must take it in like when we were heard the news of 9-11, the death of JFK, the earthquake in Japan with all the threats of radiation, or the death of our loved ones. We must struggle to understand the incomprehensible.

In order to make sure I got the message, on April 8^, 1980, Jesus came to me after I had just finished reading a book about a chaplain priest in the war. This time I was in West Africa and I had just witnessed devastating poverty. There was the moon…

We must go out to the tomb of our loved ones and experience the earthquake of our souls; the terror of death itself. It is always terrifying to journey into the death of the one we love. The whole Easter event makes no sense unless we first fall in love with Jesus like Mary Magdalene and the other Mary did. We must strive to anoint Jesus’ feet with our tears and dry them with our hair. Then we must hear all the details of his gruesome and cruel crucifixion. The death of Jesus is truly terrifying. The grief is unbearable. Nothing in this world equals the loss of our Beloved One.

And then….and then after the tragic death of our beloved, as the first day of the week was dawning on Easter Sunday, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to see the tomb. And behold, there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven, approached, rolled back the stone, and sat upon it. His appearance was like lightning and his clothing was white as snow. The guards were shaken with fear of him and became like dead men. Then the angel said to the women in reply, “Do not be afraid! I know that you are seeking Jesus the crucified. He is not here, for he has been raised just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples, ‘He has been raised from the dead, and he is going before you to Galilee; there you will see him.’ Behold, I have told you.” Then they went away quickly from the tomb, fearful yet overjoyed, and ran to announce this to his disciples. And behold, Jesus met them on their way and greeted them. They approached, embraced his feet, and did him homage. Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go tell my brothers to go to Galilee, and there they will see me.”

O my God! I realized that a few weeks later in 1979, my ship actually pulled into Israel and I was able to visit Jerusalem during Pentecost. At just 19 years of age, I walked around the city with my Muslim guide. I visited the tomb where Jesus was laid. It sits only a few yards away from the Wailing Wall (the only remaining wall of the great Jewish Temple that Jesus visited all his life) and the Rock of Mohammed (to which at the time I was able to enter into and pray in).

My beloved Jesus really died a cruel and disgusting death.

My visit was similar to how millions visit the Vietnam Memorial, Ground Zero in New York, the Oklahoma City Memorial or the grave of those we love. The grief and the wounds are overwhelming.

If we come this Easter Sunday in search of our Beloved One who was crucified, we are coming to the funeral of Jesus. When the priest raises up the Bread and breaks it, we might be terrified by the earthquake of our souls but we might also be overjoyed at the same time. On that very day, two of Jesus disciples met him on the way and recognized him in the breaking of the bread, but he vanished from their sight.

Run people! Run!

Go tell the brothers and sisters of Jesus, “Jesus has been raised from the dead, and he is going before you to your home church; there you will see him in the Breaking of the Bread!”

Where were you when you met Jesus after he was crucified and died as you ran quickly away from the tomb, fearful yet overjoyed?

Peace be with You!

Love, joy, peace,

Father Ron Moses +

www.tearinthedesert.com

Father Ron Camarda is a retired Naval Chaplain and author of “Tear in the Desert,” a powerful book containing his memoirs of life and death at the Battle for Fallujah. Father Ron appears on EWTN and recently won the Silver Medal from the Military Writers Society of America.